Excerpt from "Back Into The Sunshine"
" I've been trying to find myself for 29 years now. 29 years of a massive Tug-a-War. I hated every aspect of myself to the depths of my soul. I hated myself both mentally and physically. Every inch, I loathed every minute of every day. I was disgusted with the way I walked (I thought I walked like a guy with a football players shoulders), talked (I have a habit of slurring my words, stuttering, and not being able to find the words to say), thought (I thought I was too stupid to have thoughts and I most certainly felt I wasn’t good enough to have an opinion so I should just cut that out completely), felt (I felt like shit and I hated it.). You see my entire life inside my head has been very anti-me. I hated myself with a deep and utter passion. To this day I can’t fully understand the feelings I had and why I felt so dark. I lived in an everlasting darkness. If by chance I had a second to breathe and feel lightness I would immediately be ferociously sucked back in and fall into despair again. "
